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1. |
Love Like a Suicide
03:41
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love like a suicide
HB april 2011
v.1.
bustin’ out the windows, slammin’ the doors
throwin’ out the ornaments that she once wore
dreamin’ of a better coat than she put on
leave him, she would, on his broken down throne
<<lick>>
makin up excuses for missin’ her scene
late morning lay-outs dissected her dreams
the first time around she laughed at his jokes
they’re not quite as funny, when they get caught in your throat
(…can I love without killing me?...)
she continues to run
and tries to become a tiny piece
of what she thinks he needs
she believes all the lies
inside her mind and runs to him
just like a suicide
v.2.
she just wanna hold him without all the lines
without the trouble gettin’ them behind
without the jabs, the words that can cut
“don’t try to fix me, let me be messed up”
(…can you love without fixing me?...)
“love me just as I am
cause that’s what I am, and that should be
all that you ever need”
she continues to hide
the real her inside, and bend to him
just like a suicide
bridge
the uncomfortable skin, the burn and the ink…
will he like it this time?
will he like it on me?
is true love a memory?...
swelling with tears as her world comes unglued
she’s a body of water they all can see through…
(chorus) she continues to hide
all of the signs, to cover up
pieces of damaged pride
sweet relief in her eyes
the pain of surprise to see that she
loves him like suicide
(outro) when, she pushes aside
the darkest of lies, he runs away
….GUITAR HOOK….
try, expose all the lies,
stand up for your life, for every right…
….GUITAR HOOK….
stand, expose all the lies
the pretty disguise
….GUITAR HOOK….
don’t continue to hide all of the signs
and ask,” is your love like a suicide?”
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2. |
If I Could
03:41
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If I Could
liz hargett & hank barbee 7.4.2010
If I could play the game of life
Like I could play a hand of cards
I’d hide the best ones
Cheat the bad ones…
If I was dealt the flush royale
I would take my winnings out
Run as far as
Stay as long as…
If I could I would
Go anywhere with you, my dear
If I could I would
Run away to somewhere new
Or the middle of nowhere
If I could I would
With you…
Oh, how I need a getaway
Where nobody knows my name
And they ask nothing
And I give nothing…out
Oh, how I want to cheat today
Stack an ace below an ace
Deal the bottom
Just to win one…time
If I could I would
Go anywhere with you, my dear
If I could I would
Run away to somewhere new
Or the middle of nowhere
If I could I would
these are the cards I have been dealt
so these are the cards that I will play
I only want to fill my days
with love and music…
I feel lost within the day
Will I ever find my way?
To the place where
I belong there… home
All the lies surround my head
And every tear that I have bled
Can you tame me?
Rearrange me?...please
If I could I would
Sing in cafés, and love my new shade
If I could I would
Get away to somewhere new
Like the middle of nowhere
If I could I would…
…Would you?
*thanks Lizzy
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3. |
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Little Miss America Jones
7.31.2011
America sings in her living room
and dreams that she’s gonna get away
she’ll turn in her keys and wave ‘em goodbye one day
she walks so strong as she’s lookin up
she talk the wrong side of the law
there’s a light in her eyes and dark in her heart
Little Miss America Jones
her beautiful ordinary
was blown across the burnin’ sand
her ribbons of gold slipped right through my hands
now she walks so tall with her head high
she talk an honest life of control
there’s a light in her eyes and a piece of regret in her soul
she wakes up loud from her darkest sleep
she’s proud now on both sides of the fall
there’s a light in her eye to cut thru the dark
Little Miss America Jones
her beautiful ordinary
was blown across the burnin’ sand
her ribbons of gold slippin’ right through my hands
she sings to me in my darkest sleep
she hides me under cover of the road
lies of surprise and pieces of hope
in Little Miss America Jones
**LAP STEEL SOLO **
her beautiful ordinary
was blown across the burnin’ sand
her ribbons of gold slipped right through my hands
her pieces of ordinary
fall upon our virgin hands
they lighten the load and make a new start
for Little Miss America Jones
just look for the gold right in your heart
Little Miss America Jones
Little Miss America Jones
Little Miss America Jones
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4. |
Tangled
03:44
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tangled
hank barbee, new years 2010-11
I hope I can dream you in color tonight
I hope I can dream of that smile, it lights up my life
how do I miss talking to you?
and how I do miss lying with you lying on me
tangled all up, wrapped all around, missing your touch
when all I think of is holding you now
when you call, I will answer to anything
for I had not anticipated
feeling for you like I do…but I do…
how does she miss holding to me?
how I do miss feeling of her feeling for me
and how does she feel when she’s pressed up to me?
and how do I know if it’s meant to be, or if it is true?
where is that girl, the one that I love?
where is the one, that she’s thinking of on this chilly night?
new years eve, but the distance won’t keep me
out of reach, from her heart that heals me
and holding so fast at my side…at my side…
all this is hitting me so hard tonight, maybe I’m tired
my head is tight and wrapped around you
cause we just belong like an A before B
like I belong tangled with you when you’re tangled with me
well, I’ll come back, to Carolina time
I’ll leave the west to lonely Mountain Time
cause you wake me up inside…deep inside…
and when you call, I will answer to anything
for I had not anticipated
feeling for you like I do…but I do…
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5. |
Deluge
04:44
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deluge
5.11.11
there’s a deluge comin’ down
we’re baggin’ sand and stackin’ ground
pilin’ them up along every mile
gonna meet the flood in a little while
there’s a deluge runnin’ off
grindin’ an beatin’ on the levee walls
its an ocean motion pushin’ over field and lake
our pieces of home in a lost wake
we’re holdin’ onto nothing, “where we gonna go?”
salvation is on the river
muddy waters on the banks
where only scar and stain remain
all that once was, washed away
there’s a deluge comin’ down
we loaded the car and we’re leavin’ town
draggin’ what we can from the muddy street
and a pair of shoes for the little feet
trailer park momma, got her head down
two at her side, one in her gown
poolin’ up the sorrow as she wades along
she never had a thing worth bettin’ on
she’s holding on for life, “don’t let me go”
salvation is on the river
muddy waters on the banks
where only scar and stain remain
all that once was, washed away
hold me on, hold me on, hold me on the river
hold me on, hold me on, hold me on the river
hold me on, hold me on, hold me on the river
hold me on, hold me on, hold me on the river
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6. |
Hardwired
03:32
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hardwired
5.3.11
hardwired
I need a rewire
desire
done ruined my veins
all I want for Christmas is a poundin’-heart-beatin’-brain
live wire
I never get tired
inspired
I put the bullets away
clean up every spigot-leakin’-road-leavin’-insane
blues’n an refusin’ , keep on usin’ up another day
blowin up and throwin up and swishin’ out my sippy cup
flipside
it left me hangin’ on the
darkside
I put your picture away
post-traumatic-loneliness-disorder-under-ordained
untied
don’t wanna feel it on the
inside
don’t wanna feel it again
sifting-thru-the-rubble-of-her-wreckage-made-my-head-spin
blues’n an refusin’ , keep on usin’ up another day
blowin up and throwin up and swishin’ out my sippy cup
frantic on the outside, I was sleepin’ on the in
where the poet laid his beats down, I tried hard to walk within
I was waking up so shaken up, and just shakin’ to the core
I tried to live like I was dyin’ just to live a little more
and when the angels and their devils on my shoulders where they sit
would holler thru my empty cavern of a head and throw their fits
I tried to die like I was livin’ just to die again some more
but my disease just like a cancer grew to treat me like a whore
I was usin’ I was blues’n and never refused a single hit
I was boozin’ out and snoozin’ out and I know I need to quit
all this passin’ out and screamin’ out for help why can’t you hear
all the voices in my head I know you hear them all my dear
never knew I had it in me nothing ever looked this strange
all this life was leading up to diagnose myself as crazy
I stumbled in the dark to find the bottle or the gun
help me hold this trigger, baby, whatever happened to our fun?
hot wired
still on the run, dear
so tired
of sleepin here on the train
dose-dramatic-paranoid-a-paranormal-freeze-frame
tongue tied
under-water-shed
a rip tide
come to rattle my cage
wakin-up-so-shaken-up-an-shaking-off-the-insane
wakin-up-so-shaken-up-an-shaking-off-the-insane
wakin-up-so-shaken-up-an-shaking-off-the-insane
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7. |
Swingtime
04:37
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swingtime
hank barbee, may 2011
oh, the evening air is so fine
under half moon and blue clouded sky
laid like a blanket
across the old bricks
of the city
almost in black, almost in white
lonely and gray under streetlight
dark but not dreary
its brisk out here
but not chilly
and if you were here now
I would write your name in the sandbox
we could merry go round
and drag our toes in circles
and crawl hand in hand
to the top of the slide
I am king of the world
with you by my side
let’s unwind
on swingtime
have you ever seen a pendulum dance?
coming up weightless, coming up chance
hanging so holy
in the vertigo
known as lonely
and if you were still mine
we could write our names in the sandbox
we would merry go round
and drag our toes in circles
and we could make out
on the top of the slide
to hell with the world
when you’re by my side
my favorite one
but you’re late, hon’
for swingtime
I need to swing weightless and free
to unravel threads of old memories
take off these blues
and forget I care
about you
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8. |
Baby Blues
03:54
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Baby Blues
august 2010
Good evening, baby blues
Down in the dumps tonight, weren’t you?
Visions and futures dance in your head
Baby blues, have you heard what I’ve said?
Clouds were forming as you slept
Every dream in your slumbering head
Hoping to hold out, missing your chance
A fitful night for the hours you’ve wept
Don’t spend the rest of your life in this town
Some people can, they are supposed to
Some of them aren’t like me and you
We’re supposed to get out, baby blues
15 years has seen us confused
Keeping up with time and keeping up on you
All things change through truth or dare
Couldn’t wait to get gone, now I’m scared
You will get out and see the world anew
You will change the world and it will change you
This little town ain’t got a thing for you
It’s time to get out, baby blues
It’s one in a million, when you go
Goodbye stings, but the rest won’t hurt
It’s all gonna work out, whatever you do
It’s all gonna work so take it easy on you…
please take care of you…
You will get out and see the world anew
You will change the world and it will change you
This little town ain’t got a thing for you
Don’t forget what I say, baby blues
Wherever you go I’ll be with you
Don’t forget what I say, baby blues
Remember that I always love you
*for Miranda*
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9. |
These Were The Days
04:41
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these were the days
2.19.2011
these were the days we were gonna run
we were gonna come, disappear into
this was the time our feet would plant
into the sand, of a distant sunny blue
these were the days we were gonna fly
into the west, on a sweet by and by
and those were the times in every life
of quick goodbyes, and never ending highs
and I dream…
I see your face like a mystery
it’s comin’ clean
on sentimental blues
and I say…
your eyes shine like a holiday
lighting up my way
those sentimental blues
these were the nights when we had it all
before the fall, ripped us right in two
and this is the day I dread to see
where you and me, would never meet again
but now is the time in every life
for slow goodbyes, I’ve finally realized
that nothing lasts
longer than it’s time…
*for my brother Jon*
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10. |
Give Back
03:22
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Give Back
july 2011
what can I give to repay what’s been given me?
what does a man have to share when he’s lost everything?
what does a man feel worth when there’s not much left within?
when it’s way too soon to let it all go, too late to start over again?
I only have the wise words I heard a wise man say
I have no more saving grace than a bum who begs for change
I only need an ear sometimes or a hand to help me through
cause some days all I give back is my guitar and the truth
which way does a man go times he needs love?
when things aren’t as they seem and he’s livin with his ghosts?
when he’s run as far as he can run and been farther than he knows?
when he takes the road less traveled on and just winds up at home?
I only have the wise words I heard a wise man say
I can wrap you in my arms or I can take the blame
I can lend an ear sometimes or a hand to help you through
but some days all I give back is my guitar and the truth
I only have the wise words I heard a wise man say
I have no more saving grace than a bum who begs for change
I only need an ear sometimes or a hand to help me through
cause some days all I give back is this guitar and the truth
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11. |
The Hardest Thing
05:52
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The Hardest Thing
7.26.2010
I gave up the money
I gave up on the gun
I gave up all the smoking
Before it took my lungs
I gave up the pills
I gave up on the booze
But the hardest thing I ever did
Was givin up on you…
I gave up on some friends
I gave up on the lights
The buses and the vans
And all the airplane flights
I gave up all the highs
And now I’m living in the lows
I hoped that it would kill me quick
But it’s been too damn slow…
When I gave up on love
Love gave up on us
Everything I gave
It never was enough
The hardest thing I ever did
Was watch it slip away…
I gave up your laughs
Every evening walk
Sunday afternoons
And all our late night talks
I gave up the chance
To call you by my name
Now I’m feelin lost
And I’m the only one to blame…
When I gave up on love
Love gave up on us
Everything I gave away
Never meant that much
The hardest thing I ever did
Was watch it slip away…
I gave up the warmth
On her side of the bed
Because of the highway
And the voices in my head
I gave up the hope
Of falling back into her love
when she spoke the words I hate to hear
“it may not be enough…”
I gave up my soul
Looking for a change
I listened to the voice
The one who set the flame…
When I gave up on love
Love gave up on us
Everything I gave up
Never was enough
When I gave up on love
Love gave up on us
Everything I gave up
Never meant that much
Reachin for an end to hold
I feel it slip away
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Hank Barbee North Carolina
Guitar player, balladeer, and self-reflective life-mender all rolled up in a lanky package of boyish charm. ...an interesting evolution...combine dirty blues, roots-rock, thumb-style "Travis picking", surf, dixieland and western swing… throw in some heavy life experience and meaningful lyrical content… what’s for dinner is a rich stew of the last 100+ years of American musical heritage... ... more
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